• Nobody@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    64
    ·
    4 months ago

    I briefly recall a time when I thought unions weren’t all that ba-

    A fierce electric shock drops me to my knees. The pain thankfully subsides as I return to Rightthink. Job Creators be praised!

  • jaybone@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    31
    ·
    4 months ago

    “I have just murdered a man, but I can save hundreds on my car insurance by switching to geico.”

  • OpenStars@startrek.website
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    22
    ·
    4 months ago

    That’s so cute… to think that you’d ever be allowed to wake up again. Now for your next trick, get rid of any incriminating evidence, like the person whose hands strangled the victim.

  • MashedTech@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    7
    ·
    4 months ago

    I can’t wait to get sent a message by Elon Musk to my Neuralink to send Bitcoin and he will send double back.

  • SomeGuy69@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    6
    ·
    edit-2
    4 months ago

    Whenever I try to think hard about unionizing, my brain tries to avoid it, for some reason I get flooded with bullshit information that makes focus impossible. I hope it’s not because of my NeuraLink™ because I need it for work and social life…

    I want to buy a Tesla, but I don’t know why.