Ok, I have no idea why this bothers me and I don’t even know what to call it. My husband is a “come here” guy. Something he thinks is interesting and wants to show me - hey, come here! Nuclear apocalypse - hey, come here! Why the hell wont he just tell me why he wants me to get up, trudge to wherever he is, so that he can reveal the surprise like some sort of performative art ? I never know if it’s going to be legitimate, a disaster, or something stupid. The walk to wherever he is is insanely stressful because the whole time I’m running through all possible horrible scenarios (we’ve had a lot of issues at the house lately so I never know if I’m going to find water in the basement or raccoons in the attic or a hole in my foundation, or just him looking at a funny cat video). I’d rather he say “hey, babe, something is happening wherever/whatever, come see this.” Instead I have to have the whole performance and reveal and I fucking hate it. Anyone else know what I’m talking about or am I just mental ?

  • monobot
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    11 months ago

    Other advices are good, talk to him and explain how hard it is on you.

    My suggestion is not to expect fast change even if he understands the problem. This habits are hard to change, but possible. Just talk to him and talk again and again until he changes it.

    Another idea is that he is, unintentionally, projecting his stress onto you. I would guess he dies have some anxiety or depression issues, maybe evem he is not avare of. This is socially acceptable way of showing it to his partne.