There are games with amazing music that sets the perfect atmosphere — Celeste, Hades, Zelda (especially BotW/TotK).

And then there are games soundtracks I would also happily just put on to listen to — FFXIV, Persona 5, one particular song from Hades (Eurydice).

Ugh yes, +1 for Final Fantasy and especially XIV. At this point I think I mostly run content for the music. Shadowbringers and Endwalker have some bangers.

I see where you’re coming from, but I think the reason “queer” works well in that context is precisely because it’s a word that refers to the community as a whole, and not a specific experience within the community that is separate and different.

Calling yourself “queer” signifies nothing more that you’re part of the LGBT+ community. Which makes it a great label for those who don’t feel that any of the the other labels define them perfectly — but it also works well for those who do claim another label as their own, too.

To me, it’s important that it’s a word (and a flag) that unites us, and not one that is in any way exclusive.

(Although I agree that the flag is beautiful <3 and I’ll never tell anyone they can’t use a flag they want to use!)

I’m late, but I wanted to echo this and add an interesting fact to support it.

Studies show that bi people experience poorer mental health than gay and lesbian people, and a large part of that is thought to be because bi people are much more likely to be closeted. (See this paper: https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/00224499.2017.1387755)

I’m a mostly-closeted bi woman, for reasons similar to OP, but I found it helpful to learn that. It definitely made me feel less guilty, and more comfortable existing in the few queer spaces I can be out in.

True, but that doesn’t change the fact that if you need that kind of support right now, you’re dependent on Reddit.

And I think it’ll take a while for Lemmy to build the size of user base that makes those kinds of specialised communities viable, unfortunately. Although I very much hope it happens.

Figuring everything out under the cloud of parental intolerance is so tough. Especially with other life stresses going on. I’m so glad you have safe spaces with your wife and your friend <3

Is there somewhere (maybe with them?) that you can start leaning into more feminine gender expressions in a playful way? Not making any big decisions, but just seeing how it feels to inhabit femininity, whatever that looks like for you? (Luscious hair and perfectly smooth legs are not requirements for being a woman, thank goodness…)

We make gender such a serious thing — because it is serious for so many people. But reading your post, and all the weight you’re carrying, makes me think it would be good for you to find a way to experiment without it needing to immediately become a huge and impactful life decision.

I almost destroyed a phone once when I scrolled down to an unexpected spider image, my fight or flight response kicked in, and I threw the phone across the room. So this sounds amazing!!

Yes, genuine safety isn’t a zero-sum game. Making a space more safe for minorities doesn’t make it less safe for anyone else.

(Unless by “safe” people really mean “safe to express intolerance”, which is I think what these things often come down to…)