duderium [he/him]

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Joined 4 years ago
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Cake day: July 27th, 2020

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  • I used to do this. I obsessed over people who were uninterested in me and mistreated people who clearly WERE interested in me. It’s death drive. Everything is death drive. Unconsciously we want to fail. One of these I really regret because she was cool, nice, fun, and hot, but my friends made fun of the idea of us being together (this was in high school, she was kind of nerdy, she worked backstage while my friends and I were actors (I know)) so I chickened out and stopped talking with her. I wish I could apologize to her now although probably she would rightfully tell me to go fuck myself. This was twenty years ago.

    It took me a long time to kind of figure out both myself and the people around me, and the journey never really ends, but eventually you’ll find someone you’re crazy about and then this behavior of yours will be a thing of the past.








  • I’ve spent years thinking about this. My conclusion is that the only people who want to destroy capitalism are the ones getting fucked by it. If you’re part of the roughly 1-10% of humanity that benefits from capitalism, it’s unlikely that you’re going to question it. You’ll always be able to excuse it.

    I converted because I did everything right. I’m a white able-bodied cis male. I come from a wealthy family. I have a college degree. I still couldn’t get ahead. I couldn’t get a decent white collar job. I also saw people who, in my opinion, were of lesser ability, basically beating me in the rat race. I ran in elections as a progressive democrat, put everything I had into them, and still lost. And then when I won, I found myself sitting at the fabled bargaining table, surrounded by nazis. It infuriated me so much that I started asking questions that I had never asked before. “Are the democrats really on my side?” Radicalization from r/chapotraphouse and hexbear helped immensely. Once you seriously read Marxist texts, there’s no going back.