• 1 Post
  • 34 Comments
Joined 1 year ago
cake
Cake day: July 9th, 2023

help-circle
  • I am not a trans woman but I was hoping I could chip in with a bit about Finasteride as I used to be on it.

    Finasteride is not a general anti androgen, but it does block DHT, which is what some T gets converted to and is the most potent/effective form of T. I’m a guy and I was briefly on it for hair loss but I stopped because it made me depressed (dysphoria) and I also felt a little weaker. So at least from my experience, I would call it an anti-androgen, even if it works specifically against DHT.

    One side effect of finasteride reported by some men taking it is breast development, so I would be very surprised if it has anything to do with what you are noticing with your chest.

    Have you had a blood test recently? If that’s all good, breast growth can take a long time (several years), and ofc the full extent of it varies from person to person.



  • Just thought I’d put it out there because I feel like it would be neglectful of me not to: minoxidil fucked my skin and aged me by a good 5-10 years. And I was only using it topically on my scalp for balding! The effects on my face would have been from the residue on my pillow as I roll around in my sleep. I can’t imagine what would have happened to me if I put it on my face. Look up “minoxidil collagen breakdown” for more details; I’ll spare you them here, but taking minoxidil for 1.5 years is one of my biggest regrets.

    There is very little data on the likelihood that this impacts someone taking it, mostly bc the hair restoration industry is extremely quick to silence anyone who complains of any kind of side effect. I was even told by the Dr who prescribed it to me that I was “imagining things.”

    Whether you heed this caution or not, I wish you the best in your journey to glorious beardom.


  • Thanks. Yeah, I don’t think their comment is entirely accurate.

    If anything, at least in my case, being a “tech nerd” almost acted to validate my gender when I was a kid, and vice versa. I would have had a harder time had I been into something more traditionally feminine, because my family/other transphobes would point at it as evidence that I’m not “really” a guy.

    The original comment is probably well-intentioned, but it honestly doesn’t feel very far removed from just using “AFABs” to refer to a social group, which makes my skin crawl. I and many other trans guys’ upbringings are quite different from cis women’s.











  • I don’t think it would change my day-to-day life now as a transitioned, largely stealth, reasonably happy person. However, I’d still say yes for 2 reasons:

    1. First puberty was jarring and made irreversible changes to my body that I don’t like. The experience was traumatic and it’s something I really wish I could live without
    2. My gonads making testosterone would be much more convenient than relying on my memory/discipline lol

    I may have said no if I got puberty blockers in my early teens, but I was nowhere near that privileged.



  • I grew up in a country where gay and trans rights do not exist and where people in those communities are heavily ostracised and treated like they’re crazy. No legal recognition, no means of transitioning, no posting about it on social media, nothing

    I moved to the UK nearly 8 years ago to start living my life, and the UK is… well. I’ll start off by saying that it’s infinitely better about trans people than where I come from. But I don’t think it’s good about trans people on the whole.

    ‘Legal’ transition only matters for the terms you are referred to in legal documentation around marriage/parenthood, and whether or not you need to tell the tax body your AGAB. A name change (which includes your title) is trivial. To fix the other stuff, you have to get letters from doctors and fill out a form and pay a fee and wait a while for some mysterious council to decide if you’re trans enough. I think most people don’t bother.

    Medical transition is very inaccessible, and I suspect I’m privileged in that I got through the waitlist back when it was a few years for an appointment, and not basically indefinite. Doctors agreeing to actually prescribe your HRT after that entire dance is hit or miss, although the majority would continue to prescribe patient who has already been on it for a while, in my experience anyway.

    The UK is also a bit insane on anti-trans media. That’s the only thing I didn’t have to deal with back home, lol (because trans people are not recognised or talked about) I can’t see a reason for being under the media’s crosshairs than being an easy scapegoat for the ruling political party to distract voters from real systemic issues that actually need fixing.




  • I also have ASD and I actually have the complete opposite view! I don’t like it when people text me expecting me to reply instantly, because I don’t feel like text conversations have a well-defined start and end. That bothers me in a “unfinished business” way. As in, if I respond immediately, and then they respond immediately, and so on and so forth, when does it end? Nobody really says goodbye in instant messaging anymore. I appreciate people who understand that I’m going to take my sweet time to respond, especially because I don’t use my smartphone often anyway (as it’s very distracting and can be a huge time sink for me).

    I like to let all my friends know that if something is important or they want an imminent response, they should just call me instead. That way I don’t have that feeling that “the ball is in my court” after the call ends, i.e. that I need to check my phone and respond to something before someone arbitrarily decides it’s been too long and gets upset with me.

    I am a “zillennial” (born in the late 90s), and one of the things I miss about the early days of the internet with stuff like MSN is the focus on statuses (online, busy, offline) and how accurate they were. If someone were marked as online, you knew they were on the computer at that very moment and it’s not just whatever status they had set on their smartphone or whatever.