Stamets, you ok, friend? I have thoughts like this sometimes and when they start to show up repeatedly, I’m usually having a pretty rough time of it.
Hopefully, it’s just some jokes, since everybody feels this way sometimes, but I hope everything is ok. I’m just some stranger on the Internet, but DM me if you need someone to talk to. Cheers, bud.
Honestly no I’m not but its whatever. Talking wont change it. Just make me feel guilty.
thanks though
That sucks. There’s not much I can say beyond cliched platitudes, but just know that you’re far from alone in whatever struggles you face.
If you’re really feeling that way, I’d highly encourage you to talk to a professional. You’re right, if you’re feeling that overwhelmed or depressed, talking to a random stranger is not likely to make much of a difference, but in my own life I noticed a huge difference when talking to a therapist. For one, I never really felt that guilt of “monopolizing the conversation,” because they are literally being paid to listen and help you work through issues.
Your mileage may vary, of course, but going to at least a few sessions might make a significant difference, and if it’s not for you, so be it. There’s not much at risk and there’s a huge upside if it does help.
This is me with some differences, my parents were in their late 30s and I was not planned but kept. Very rare are the days that I don’t wish they made another decision. They clearly didn’t really want me and I spent all my childhood and teenage years essentially alone. I have one memory, one, of doing something with my father, none with my mother.
I feel this. It hasn’t really gone away, like if I had a button I could push and wink out of existence I would press it, but now that I’m mid life and out of my 30s and still… somehow alive, it’s like idk. It’s still there, but I don’t really think about it any more?
