But even some progressive gay white men say they feel alienated from a movement they see becoming more radical, particularly online, where the tenor of conversation is often uncivil.
Hot take: I’m honestly, vocally sick of settler-gay men who demand that you handle them with kid gloves when their entire existence within the community is an existence blanketed in microaggression at best, when they’re not being outright full-on macroaggressive about someone that ‘doesn’t fit their “preference”’; and I’m genuinely glad people are starting to talk about it.
Sometimes coming to an unfortunate realization about yourself or a group you align with feels like a slap in the face, and a slap in the face usually causes a reaction whether it’s warranted or not. It’s good to be aware of your own reactionary behavior, and we often make it seem like being reactionary is the greatest sin of all, but sometimes otherwise good people just need a minute to work through it. We don’t all have perfect ideology all the time, and while it’s good to expect the best of your comrades, sometimes giving them time and kindly pointing them in the right direction is better than abrasively calling them out.