The impulsivity is bad, wasted so much money and time. The hyperfocus, when on the wrong task, has cost me hours in that day. The poor planning / time management has landed me in a world of hurt more times than I care to admit. The low tolerance for distractions / hot temper has caused me to hurt those whom I love most in this world. The inability to properly direct my focus on a task has caused me to lose sight of, and therefore miss, deadlines.
That’s all bad.
But the worst part for me? The part that doctors don’t seem to even attempt to address (except for direct symptom management, which barely work)? Emotional mirroring. If you’re depressed and I’m with you, guess what happens to me? Today sucked. Depression is an unrelenting removed, and I hate her with every fiber of my being.
My doctor said it was a symptom of some forms of ADHD. She said an official name for it, but I don’t remember it. She described it as ‘emotional mirroring’, and it made so much sense. I’ve been dealing with it for years, thinking it was normal for everyone. At least I know I do this now, and can try to regulate. Just couldn’t seem to be able to yesterday.