Edit2: It’s a subjective perception I’m talking about. Are you offended? Why?

What’s the matter, why can’t men deal with me being sensitive and emotional? Is it because they struggle with me reminding them of having, too, emotions?

Edit: Do men think I’m weak when I show emotions? If so, why?? Why do women see it as a sign of strength when men are vulnerable, but men don’t seem to get it? Are they/are we dumb??

  • huginn@feddit.it
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    39
    arrow-down
    6
    ·
    1 year ago

    This is what is commonly referred to as “toxic masculinity”. That’s the crux of what they’re talking about. It’s not just that men are taught to be dangerous to those around them, it’s that we’re also taught to be hard and lonely Islands that seek no support.

    It’s no way to live and it crushes you over time.

    • Seudo@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      7
      ·
      edit-2
      1 year ago

      As opposed to masculinity. Look at Gilgamesh, Achelies, even the godfather of stoicism Marcus Arilius. Historically peak alpha males never muffled their emotions.

    • heird
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      1
      arrow-down
      2
      ·
      1 year ago

      Not quite, I have a group of male friends who are very comfortable with being emotional with each other and I still prefer opening to women because they are much more concerned and able to deal with it, lot of men still don’t know what to do with it.

      • huginn@feddit.it
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        2
        arrow-down
        1
        ·
        1 year ago

        You’re still describing the effects of toxic masculinity, just the 2nd order effects rather than the first.

        Why do you think a lot of men don’t know what to do with it? Why do you think a lot of men aren’t concerned?

        It’s not some innate aspect of being a woman: it’s a suppressed aspect of being a human that society has pressed out of men.

        • heird
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          1
          arrow-down
          2
          ·
          1 year ago

          They aren’t as used to talk about emotions and relationships so it’s easier to go with someone that is.

          It’s no assumptions just facts

            • heird
              link
              fedilink
              arrow-up
              1
              arrow-down
              2
              ·
              1 year ago

              I mean sure but if you want to look more in depth it’s not just toxic masculinity, there’s also toxic femininity involved most men have been hurt by their previous partner who they opened up to and their partner then used it against them or even ridiculed them in front of an audience. Or women around them mocked them for being emotional and crying

              • Tenniswaffles@lemmy.blahaj.zone
                link
                fedilink
                arrow-up
                2
                ·
                1 year ago

                What you’re describing is still toxic masculinity and has absolutely nothing to do with toxic femininity. Men that have been hurt by their previous partners or ridiculed for being emotional, is toxic masculinity. This is because men are discouraged from expressing their emotions or seeking support, reinforcing the harmful stereotype that vulnerability is a sign of weakness. Men get hurt by women doing this because of the toxic view many men and women carry about masculinity and male gender roles.

                Toxic femininity on the other hand, is a societal expectation placed on women to conform to traditional gender roles and stereotypes, like being passive, nurturing, and submissive.

                • heird
                  link
                  fedilink
                  arrow-up
                  1
                  arrow-down
                  1
                  ·
                  edit-2
                  1 year ago

                  Nope

                  Examples of Toxic Femininity

                  To identify toxic femininity, you need to know what to look out for to ensure they are not falling victim to toxic femininity guise as friendship or niceness by some women. The telltale signs include:

                  Slut-shaming and body-shaming – women who slut-shame or body shame others are toxic Talking over other people and belittling others, especially fellow women Making fun of another female to get the attention of a man. Shaming men for being too soft or having feminine traits that do not live up to societal expectations of what a man is. Passive aggression behavior can include patronizing behavior, fake niceties, and smiley faces after a harsh text. Sabotaging and backstabbing behavior like lying for their benefit, offering misleading advice, manipulating situations, and mocking others for their decisions. Resentment, jealousy, and bitterness towards others, especially fellow women, for their popularity, looks, and achievements Negative competitiveness with other women through dominance or sexuality