• jet@hackertalks.com
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    1 year ago

    Don’t touch anything. Leave the area immediately.

    Call 911, report the event. Call a lawyer immediately. Right after 911. If there is time I’d notify my immediate family. Ask them to coordinate with the lawyer, and my work, in case I’m not available.

    Wait until I have representation before giving a statement to the police. This will be super duper hard to do, but I’ll just keep saying “my lawyer is XXX, I will only make a statement with my lawyer. I’m using my right to remain silent until then”

    Have my lawyer contact the next of kin. Work with home owners insurance to iron out any issues.

    If not in jail help organize the funeral arrangements with my friends family. Hire biohazard cleaners to clean house, stay outside the house until that’s resolved.

    Have a monk or priest come by to bless the house again and put any spirits to rest. (just in case)

  • Sludgehammer@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    If The Sims has taught me anything it’s that you should A) Freak out, B) Cry over the tombstone that suddenly appeared out of nowhere, C) Flirt with the personification of death that appears to reap the soul of your guest, D) Rate the party as a real downer and belittle the person throwing the party.

    Bonus points for wetting yourself at some point during the whole ordeal.

  • moipe@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Look, I invited him in and we had a wonderful time until dawn. Is it my fault the blackout curtains weren’t closed all the way? Yes. Will Dracula be pissed? Only if he can regenerate from being disintegrated. The relationship was just getting a little too claustrophobic for my liking.

  • eldoom@lemm.ee
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    1 year ago

    I’d probably go to bed because I am clearly not awake and this must be a dream.