Expect the petroleum!

I am 51 years old. I do not know a single man my age who didn’t at one point wield a wooden light saber.

When the brush falls off the broom handle, you know you want to raise that handle up as if it was an elegant weapon for a more civilized age…and make the noise. Admit it.

Idiot, that’s not how you hold a lightsaber.

My wife just picked up a stick on our hike yesterday and said “hey, this looks like a Harry Potter wand”, and then started casting spells until our dog snatched it out of her hand and ran off with it.

Every single chopstick in the cutlery drawer gets a swish and flick from me…