First of all, this might be the wrong community to post this on. I would appreciate it if someone could point me to a more appropriate one were it the case.

I’ve been made aware of this manipulation technique on social media and I sort of saw some of my behaviours, so now I’m wondering: have I “love bombed” someone? I am looking at this with hindsight as our relationship is now over.

I’ve met this person online and we really hit it off, we had fun chatting and we did a lot of it, any free time we had was a good time to talk. After some time we started dating (long distance) and I complimented them a lot, I said “I love you” a lot and we spent a lot of time in calls and texting.

I never got mad at them for any reason, we only fought towards the end and I never felt bad when they went out with friends or spent time with somebody else. I did have the chance to hang out with their friends as well and I enjoyed it.

So how do I know if all those compliments and all those “I love you” were somehow manipulative? I loved them a lot and I grew to depend on them. How do I know if the things I said were actually hurting them psychologically and, if they were, how can I get better? How can I make sure to never do such a thing again?

If you have any questions I will do my best to answer

  • talanorchous@lemmy.worldM
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    1 year ago

    It is great to be introspective and want to identify any potentially toxic traits we may have. In this instance, you wrote that you loved them. You told them exactly how you felt about them. If you were intentionally acting a certain way only to act completely differently later on, that would be a different story.