If I could download the contents of a single politician’s brain, I think I’d probably choose Mandleson.

Any time something truly shady and corrupt is going on he’s always there, right in the middle of it. For like 3 decades now. And no matter how many scandals come and go he just remains, stuck to the bowl of politics no matter how many times the toilet flushes. The things he knows that we’ll never get to hear about must be fascinating.