DISCLAIMER - I am not planning on fighting a pelican.

there’s a brown pelican that hangs out on the railing of a very narrow portion of a boardwalk nearby. the only reason it makes me nervous is because it’s huge, but their nails look short, and their beaks are pointed, but curved downwards so they would have to try to bite me with that long thing instead of pecking me.

like, if a bird capable of clawing or eating my eyes out attacked my face, I’d honestly have no qualms about killing it immediately. but if I ever get attacked by a pelican, it looks like I could just kind of hold it off without having to hurt it. am I right in that?

  • mechoman444@lemmy.world
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    10 days ago

    I don’t know if he’d fuck you per se. But he might make sweet sweet love to you

    Cue the Barry manilow

          • Ellia Plissken@lemm.eeOP
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            10 days ago

            society as a whole has agreed that “yo momma” jokes are not actually about the other party’s mother. people like you who break that convention gets this