My ex-friend, the one I’m still torn up over, used to be one of my dealers. They lived far away but I would pick up from them as an excuse to go hang out.

I asked them not to sell (meth) to me anymore because I was trying to quit. But then I gave up again. I asked if I could pick up a dub from them because my main dealer was out and his plug wasn’t getting back to him. They texted back “No you may not.” Another time I went and asked, pleaded for them to sell to me. They said no. When I begged they went like “Let me think about that for a seco—No.” And they continued to persist as time went on, because they’re a “Man of their word” lol.

And a couple years ago, I went to buy heroin for someone, and—they looked like they’d been crying, and they asked me in what sounded like the most pitiful, heartbreaking voice if I was “sure” it wasn’t for me.