Develop into your own beautiful human, first. A lot of dudes are mid at best; myself included

  • Tyfud@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    Spot on. For years I had my self worth valued based on the women I was with/dating.

    After a divorce and string of bad relationships/breakups, I realized the issue was, largely, because of me. I wasn’t focused and invested in myself enough to be comfortable without a partner in my life. Which made me desperate, and that comes across and attracted the wrong sort of women to me, as well as kept my self worth artificially low so I allowed myself to be abused by others in the relationships.

    Spend time on yourself and being comfortable being alone. Be happy alone first. Then look for opportunities to meet people who can enhance your happiness, but not be the source of your happiness, if that makes any sense. That’s how good relationships work I finally learned.

    • Vilian@lemmy.ca
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      3 months ago

      Happy for you! That’s what I aim for, be happy alone, I already had a bad relationship and I learned that if i valued myself I would had jump out way sooner, ironically I would have suggested to any woman with half the relationship problems mine had to terminate immediately, and that’s where I learned that I value the happiness and well being of others but not myself