I also don’t think child predators end up marrying and making children with their victims (or at least is uncommon?). I am very aware of the relationship between religious people and abuses. This has very little in common with it: it is right there in the open, it is a long-lasting relationship, she was not a child (although much younger), we don’t have any pattern (as usual comes up in cases of abuse) etc.
Your argument is literally about the age gap, rephrasing it as “middle-aged and minor” doesn’t mean much (also at 18 she was not a minor and you don’t know when they actually started a relationship, do you?). Also I didn’t say anything about what she looked (strawman), I just said that at 18 you are not a child anymore, let alone at 22. You get the right to vote and to do what you want in many countries, in many places at 19-20 people already have kids and are married (especially in rural areas). These are mostly social convention that have to do with how society function and is organized.
Again, I find this depiction of people at 18 as children an unnecessary infantilization of the population.
Also mine are not scare quotes, are a way to signify that I am using that term without really meaning it, which I think is what quotes are sometimes meant to be used for.
The fact is, the “limit” above which the age gap becomes creepy/predatory is arbitrary, it’s cultural, it’s based on moral stances but it’s not in any case objective, and personal situations can anyway vary (I.e. some people at 18 are very mature, other are very immature). Where do you put the limit? Tom Haverford rule (half the age + 2)?
i don’t want to keep going back and forth saying the same stuff over and over, so we disagree.
i just wanted to point out the way you used the quotation marks is called scare quotes. weird name but that’s what they’re generally called.
i think it is called that because the author is afraid to use the term directly so they use these quotes to signal they don’t mean the contents, but aren’t necessarily quoting anyone either.
They’re making any argument that avoids addressing the intent and involvement of a 40 year old man with a high school girl. There isn’t anything to salvage from the topic.
I don’t know, that’s my point. I guess I would consider what is generally the law, plus if I had to pass jusgement I would want to know more on a case-by-case basis.
I suppose there are cases where 20-25 is already a huge age gap that I would consider creepy. People are wildly different.
Yeah its safer to not make any guesses I suppose. We would have to get that information either from the supposed victim or the abuser though, and there would be questions about how trustworthy that is.
I guess if we had like surveillance and communications that showed behavior like that.
I disagree with your safe bet then.
I also don’t think child predators end up marrying and making children with their victims (or at least is uncommon?). I am very aware of the relationship between religious people and abuses. This has very little in common with it: it is right there in the open, it is a long-lasting relationship, she was not a child (although much younger), we don’t have any pattern (as usual comes up in cases of abuse) etc.
Your argument is literally about the age gap, rephrasing it as “middle-aged and minor” doesn’t mean much (also at 18 she was not a minor and you don’t know when they actually started a relationship, do you?). Also I didn’t say anything about what she looked (strawman), I just said that at 18 you are not a child anymore, let alone at 22. You get the right to vote and to do what you want in many countries, in many places at 19-20 people already have kids and are married (especially in rural areas). These are mostly social convention that have to do with how society function and is organized.
Again, I find this depiction of people at 18 as children an unnecessary infantilization of the population.
Also mine are not scare quotes, are a way to signify that I am using that term without really meaning it, which I think is what quotes are sometimes meant to be used for.
The fact is, the “limit” above which the age gap becomes creepy/predatory is arbitrary, it’s cultural, it’s based on moral stances but it’s not in any case objective, and personal situations can anyway vary (I.e. some people at 18 are very mature, other are very immature). Where do you put the limit? Tom Haverford rule (half the age + 2)?
i don’t want to keep going back and forth saying the same stuff over and over, so we disagree.
i just wanted to point out the way you used the quotation marks is called scare quotes. weird name but that’s what they’re generally called.
i think it is called that because the author is afraid to use the term directly so they use these quotes to signal they don’t mean the contents, but aren’t necessarily quoting anyone either.
They’re making any argument that avoids addressing the intent and involvement of a 40 year old man with a high school girl. There isn’t anything to salvage from the topic.
So where would you put the limit? If I had to guess your position, you think age limits to be arbitrary and useless?
I don’t know, that’s my point. I guess I would consider what is generally the law, plus if I had to pass jusgement I would want to know more on a case-by-case basis.
I suppose there are cases where 20-25 is already a huge age gap that I would consider creepy. People are wildly different.
Yeah its safer to not make any guesses I suppose. We would have to get that information either from the supposed victim or the abuser though, and there would be questions about how trustworthy that is.
I guess if we had like surveillance and communications that showed behavior like that.