text here

  • mustGo [any]@hexbear.net
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    19
    ·
    6 months ago
    • download every episode of Winnie the Poo
    • navigate to Tienanmen Square daily
    • record yourself feeding sparrows every morning

    You will be immediately classified as a high threat target and directly monitored by Xi Jinping.

    • SkingradGuard [he/him, comrade/them]@hexbear.net
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      9
      ·
      6 months ago

      It’s true, I did this and Xi used Juche necromancy (which he learned from the evil Kim Jong un) to resurrect Mao, who then proceeded to make me endure a struggle session and then sent me to the countryside to chop trees.