I do like large gatherings, but I don’t really do well meeting people and making friends in them. I find it too chaotic and difficult to “be myself” with so many people. I also feel there tends to be more shallow conversation in these settings making it great for banter and social energy but less great for connecting and getting to know new folks.
I am looking to meet new people to be friends, as in capital F friend, not just a random person I know. Someone who wants to hit me up and go do something fun, check in on me and see how I’m doing, etc.
How do you go about meeting people and finding social settings that foster deeper connections?
Small gatherings! I joined a gaming group on meetup that averages 3-8 people a week. It’s not required that you go every week, so there’s usually a unique mix of people. Board game groups seem to be the millennial version of going to the bar every Friday.
I’m glad you brought this up. So my brother tried this and had limited success with it, which made me dismiss the thiught. I love the idea but I’m worried because I like board games but I’m not a “nerd” with them. Do you think I would fit in if I was more of a casual board gamer?
It depends on the group you join! I’m sure there are groups geared towards more casual gamers that have a shallower difficulty curve. I’m a fan of many-session tabletop RPGs (like DnD) and depending on who you have running the group, you can alter the rules to fit the skill set of the people playing. One time my mates and I were at the pub and played an impromptu game of DnD with no characters, spells, items etc - the guy running it just described what the situation was; we described what we wanted to do; and we then rolled a D20 with the guy running it deciding whether or not we were successful, or what unintended consequences happened as a result. It was tonnes of fun!
That’s totally fine 😊 In my group, there’s a small handful who are really into games and buy everything. They pick up lots of games from Etsy and Kickstarter that no one’s heard of before and teach us how to play. Last week it was Wizard Kittens which took maybe 5 minutes to learn.
The most important thing though when trying to make friends is accepting failure. Instead of automatically dismissing it, just try it out and see whether or not it’s worth your time. Even if you find out it’s not for you, there may be someone there who can direct you towards a different hobby.