• Zozano@lemy.lol
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    5 months ago

    I’m still waiting for my proposal regarding instant orgasm to be classified as sexual assault regardless of whichever animal it’s cast on.

    I don’t care how hard it is to breed Panda’s, we can’t just make them nut on command.

    I’m not pointing fingers here, we’ve all made our pets seize on the ground for a good twenty minutes or so while we finish the latest episode of Keeping Up with Prostatulus uninteruppted, but we’ve got to do something to stop the fucking apprentices from doing it for shits and giggles, it’s pretty sick when you stop to think about it.

    At a bare minimum limit the orgasms to one minute, and necessitate a bodily fluid retention spell. I’m tired of stepping over the puddles when sneaking out the newbloods quarters.

    • Missmuffet@lemmy.worldOP
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      5 months ago

      The Wizard Council (long may they live) has decided that it is fine so long as it isn’t also cast with the Mend Buttcrack spell, as both spells are too destructive when used in tandem. I mean, I see where they’re coming from, but it’s far from the only spells that are strong when cast together, so I think they’re probably just responding to the current Wizard meta tbh (you didn’t hear it from me though).

      • Programmer Belch@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        5 months ago

        I was scared my best tactic to break a concentration spell will be banned for the following tournaments.

        This ban can do nothing against the spiciness spells other casters use before the tournament to harm the body and soul of other contestants.

      • Programmer Belch@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        5 months ago

        I’m sure Paul has made a Bene Gesserit soil themselves at least once to discredit them

        spoiler for God Emperor of Dune

        I wouldn’t be surprised if the stolen journals had a recounting of Leto making an entourage of Bene Gesserit shit themselves while in a walk to negate a spice allotment

  • Evil_Shrubbery@lemm.ee
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    5 months ago

    Yes.

    Always cast those two the other way around.

    Mended crack full of explosive diarrhoea acts the same as cast fireball but with poison damage.