No. This is a bank
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I know some bank tellers who say they are taught to comply with ANY robbery instructions. Even if it’s as simple as someone slipping them a note saying, “This is a robbery” with no explicit threats. If they feel comfortable, they can slip him the marked bills or dye packs, but they won’t be punished if they don’t. Get the robber out, lock the door, call the cops.
I could totally see the tellers recognizing the avocado for what it was and figuring it was on the cops to catch him, not theirs.
How interesting! Which banks are these, by the way? So we know which ones are safest to work at, of course.
Get the robber out, lock the door, call the cops.
For us it was ‘hit the silent alarm as soon as it is safe to do so’ instead of calling the cops ourselves. Hitting the alarm would trigger a whole chain of events, which included alerting the cops, region manager and an emotional support team and sending out a notification to our intranet that your office would not be reachable for the rest of that day and the day after. It would also immediately notify the correct police departments, which was another reason why we were instructed to not call the alarm number.
Our robber wrapped a plastic bag around his arm so probably didn’t have a firearm, but you simply do not take that risk. Although my colleague had to tell that nitwit that he walked into a branch office that didn’t handle money and had nothing on premises, which was clearly advertised at the door. It did have an ATM, but, as was also made very clear on the outside, we didn’t have access to that. Never seen somebody so confused, fortunately he 180’d out of there. We were lucky that it was probably just somebody who acted on an impulse, another office a few streets down had a real armed robbery, where one of my colleagues got a gun put to her head. Took her years to get her live back on track.
Yeah, they probably got the money, along with one hell of an eye roll.
It seems to have been a fruitful endeavour.
A vegetable one
It has a pit yo. That’s a fruit.
Avocado is a fruit because it has a[sic] flesh and a seed, it comes from a tree, and it can be eaten. https://www.healthline.com/nutrition/is-avocado-a-fruit-or-a-vegetable
Wow, ok, my avocado will never be the same
“…for 32,000$, thus breaking even with the money he initially invested buying avocados to commit the heist”.
All because of that toast! All because of that God damned toast!
On a somewhat related note, that Sun Tzu quote reminds me of something he did. Sun Tzu had a rivalry with this other general who he often got into skirmishes with and always defeated him or outmaneuvered him with some kind of trickery. So one time this rival general actually had Sun Tzu on the ropes and had chased him into a bit of a corner. Sun Tzu was in a smallish fort with the enemy general closing in and he definitely did not have enough soldiers to hold the fort for long.
So instead of trying to intimidate his rival with a show of force or making his army seem bigger than it was or whatever else he might have tried instead when his rival arrived at the fort he found the front gate fully open and nobody in sight except Sun Tzu himself sitting on the battlement playing an instrument somewhat akin to a lyre I think.
His rival was so wary of trickery that he assumed it must be a trap, or a distraction while a larger army moves in to reinforce him, so he left and Sun Tzu and his army survived.
Sun Tzu isn’t in that story, it is a tale about Zhuge Liang and Sima Yi from the Three Kingdoms period.
Oh interesting! I must have mixed my facts up or something, my bad. You’re right that it’s attributed to Zhuge Liang, but it seems like Wikipedia thinks it was a fictional story when attributed to Zhuge Liang, but it looks like he wasn’t the first to use this strategy and he wasn’t the last. Regardless, I was wrong about Sun Tzu having done it and I learned more about history, so thanks!
Here’s the Wikipedia article I was referring to: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Empty_Fort_Strategy#Zhuge_Liang
A lot of the stuff in modern The Art Of War publications was added later - basically glorified notes - by scholars who assume it illustrates some point made by Sun Tzu. They don’t always hit their mark, though.
Sun Tzu says: if you are strong, appear weak. If you are weak, appear strong.
Damn millennials and their avocado grenades!
So you do actually have to be able to defend against an avocado attack before you move on to pointed sticks. TIL.
“And don’t come crying to me when some maniac comes at you with a passion fruit!”
When avocado guy is caught, he’s gonna be TOAST!
Well, the best way to stop a bad guy with an avocado is a good guy with an avocado.
If you want to be financially independent, stop buying avocado toast. Use the avocado to hold up a bank instead.
I hate that i recognize that this quote is actually a screen shot from Call of Duty Modern Warfare 2 (2009)
Bet he still loses at poker
If fighting is sure to result in victory you must fight.
Hey! There’s been a robbery
She stole my heart and guacamole
