I have friends who are Afghan who have had arranged marriages so this led me to be curious to ask, why does this practice still persist into the 21st century?

  • southsamurai@sh.itjust.works
    31·
    6 months ago

    Being real, it depends on what people think marriage is.

    There’s multiple concepts out there, which may or may not conflict with each other.

    What really matters is the people involved agreeing on which concepts they will be engaging in. That’s the truth no matter if it’s arranged or not.

    Now, when arranged = forced, that’s some fucked up shit. But the two aren’t inherently the same thing.

    When it comes right down to it, “marriage” is just a word for a formalized union between people that is recognized by the community/state. How the people involved get there is kinda meaningless. A carefully arranged marriage in a culture where marriage is done for practical reasons is no worse of a concept than two random drunks in vegas getting hitched just because. It’s not even a worse concept than two people that love each other choosing to formalize their bond (and it doesn’t even have to be romantic love, good friends can sometimes a marriage make).

    I’m not saying the culture in Afghanistan is good or bad. I do have my doubts that the marriages arranged are done so in a healthy and equitable manner, but that’s a separate issue from assuming that arranged marriages are somehow a relic of the past and that it should die out. They still exist because people want them to.