• LibertyLizard@slrpnk.net
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    9 months ago

    Hilarious. I actually witnessed this online when someone tried to “well actually” another user and it turned out that user was the author of the paper they cited.

    • wizardbeard@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      9 months ago

      I see it happen a lot online with people “looking for help with”, but really just looking to vent about, open source software.

      And I encounter it a lot at work with policies, reference docs, and little PowerShell scripts I’ve written.


      “Hello I am tech support. Sysadmin, please help with strange situation A

      Sure thing, you’ll need to do X.

      “But that doesn’t match our documentation, it says to do Y and that’s not working”

      My man, look at the changelog on the first page. I wrote it and made most of the updates for the first year we had it. This is an exception, and adding it to the doc would have bloated it outrageously for how infrequently this comes up. Especially to explain the why. I’d also need to try to cover all the other rare exceptions, which would turn the doc into an absolutely useless shitshow. Anyway, I should have a PowerShell script to handle it, give me a bit to find it.

      “Ahckstually, Numpty #3 says our team has a PowerShell script to handle it already, no worries! Thanks!”

      Motherfu- My brother in christ who do you think wrote that? You know I used to be on your team, and I just said- My name is in the first line of the scri- I mean cool, glad I could help you get it sorted.


      Similar story, talking with a vendor. Again, I’m the one not in quotes.

      I need you to connect me with a technical resource on your side for assistance with attempting an alternate solution Y for the issue we are facing, which Important Muckety Muck #7 in my company said you were able to do for them. I understand that I previously suggested that we could do X on our side as a solution for our problem. As we’ve moved forward in other places on this project, we have found that X will not work for us as a solution for reasons A, B, and C.

      (He’s breathing loudly through his mouth, hanging agape between words like some great panting missing-link-between-man-and-ape who has somehow found his way into a sales position. Somewhere in the dark recesses of his mind, the sounds of the wind through jungle trees, the calls of ancient and exotic birds and animals, the quiet noises of strange insects alien to this modern time and place, all combine into a beautiful primal music lost to the modern world. It flits through his subconcious, never quite fully able to be grasped.)

      “I am the technical resource. According to my notes, X was identified as a solution to your problem.”

      (This was not some poor third world guy stuck in a call center having to follow a basic help desk script. Same first language, a few states away, he’d been involved with this project the whole way)

      AS STATED IN MY PREVIOUS EMAIL