I’ve been trying to get into a routine of going for a morning walk. It’s not far, just basically climbing a hill near home, sitting down on a bench at the top pretending to enjoy the view but really trying not to pass out because I’m terribly unfit, then back down.
Well, guess what used to be in that patch of dirt? Yep, my bench.
Who suddenly took it away? No idea. For what purpose? Beats me.
Now I just have to defiantly sit on the grass next to it and dare anyone to comment.
Hmph.
What’s grinding your gears today?
Dual benefit of a walking stick/seat combo.
- Handy for a seat whenever/wherever you want
- When you find them, use it to chase down whoever stole the bench…
This reminded me of an old rant I have, if legacy rants are allowed.
In a job I had many years ago I met a Lord. An actual Lordy Lord. He used one of these things frequently, but it’s not part of the rant.
Where I worked sold stone, big slabs of stone for using as big slabs of stone. He came to us on a particularly rainy day and asked me to show him around the yard. I look out the window, rain is pelting the floor and ricocheting back into the sky. We go outside. He had an umbrella, I did not. He did not offer to share.
So around the yard we go, and I show him all the stone. When we reach the last one he turns to me and says “perhaps I’ll come back when it’s not raining”.
I feel like his actions here were carefully calculated just to see what the plebs will put up with.
On a different occasion when we were selling Christmas trees his groundskeeper came to us and asked for a free tree for the Lord.
They weren’t the same of course but we found it funny because the Lord owned the woodlands behind the shop. He didn’t get a free tree.
I like the way you think! Plus this would complete my transition into officially middle aged.
-my hayfever is being a bastard
-my son is going through another sleep regression. Today was OK, yesterday we were up at 430
Urgh, you have my sympathies. Hay fever solidarity.
You know what your mission is. When the trek is no longer strenuous, carry your own seat up there :p
I can actually make it all the way up without stopping to hold onto a tree and catch my breath halfway, now, so I can only assume peak fitness awaits me very soon.
Today’s rant: I mentioned yesterday that I enjoyed the rant threads of a Thursday, but today I don’t have anything to rant about.
Meta-rant?
Hmm that’s a tricky one. I’ve just stabbed myself in the thumb with a cross stitch needle, you can pretend that happened to you if you like?
That sucks. Maybe they’ll replace it?
That’s a shame: perhaps the bench was removed because of complaints about its use (e.g. drug dealing, drinking alcohol, intimidation, noise disturbance)? Maybe it was fine when you walked up there but had problems in the evening, for locals.
If so, then removing the bench would only cause ne’er-do-wells to relocate, perhaps not far. Or they might all bring walking stick/seats and gather round on them in the same spot!
Excellent of you to take up a routine of walking: I should do the same…
Maybe someone complained about a middle aged lady huffing and puffing her way up there every morning and being embarrassingly sweaty at passers by… 🤔
If you bring a bench with extra long legs, some pouring cement and a digger I reckon you can install a bench nobody can remove. Of course you’ll need to carry this stuff all the way up but that’s just good exercise.
This hurts my soul… but I can see in an act of revenge on your passing to place a bench there out of spite. Engraved it on a message to those who had removed it
Along with a terrifying curse to stop them taking the new one. I like it.
If you are planning to put a memorial bench there - or anywhere - you can add it to our crowdsourced list at https://openbenches.org :-)
Smooth plug, respect ;)
Thus begins the horror movie, where councilers go to the park and remove the bench. One by one each counciler is chased by an angry ghost in a hockey mask and hatchet to be slain. The movie will be called “Tuesday the 13th”
