It is very likely a case of the area I specifically live in, but I’ve just about had it after waking up to a message earlier today that I’m letting live rent-free in my head.
I admittedly go off on tangents and sometimes write a fuck ton if there is a means to do so (e.g., a Discord server). Most people I interact with on non-political levels, such as childhood friends I’ve maintained, do one of two things: they read it and respond, or they don’t and let it fly. I’ve made peace with that, to the extent I even made a separate channel on our shared Discord server just for me to rant on shit that’s not appropriate to other channels, and everyone is cool with that. I have no problem making friends everywhere I go and maintaining them.
But every (and I shit you not every) political circle I get involved in locally does not entertain this. It almost seems like it irks them if I try to start up a discussion or get involved in one. Due to the nature of our getting together, it’s political. Duh. Political discussions can run long, in time and content. It’s actually kind of wild to me how a political circle verbally and rudely refuses to read more than a paragraph if they have total freedom to ignore it, or even just refuses to engage any of it at all most of the time past aphorisms or thought-terminating clichés. What is the point of having a group if you aren’t going to discuss and build community in the off-hours?
I think that is my point, and I’ve seen all (and I kid you not all) of the local groups fail prior because of this inability to build a community at core. It can individually be a fault of platform (not everyone uses one but joined it thinking they might start), time, stress/mental health, introversion, etc., and all of those are understandable, but seeing it happen on repeat seems to me to be more a symptom of something local. I’m the only person keeping some of these groups alive, until I’m not such as when I feel there’s nothing left of beneficence to myself. COVID seemingly worsened it, reducing the lifespan on these groups from months to weeks and the frequency of their creation from several a year to one or less annually.
Trust me, I’ve self-reflected on this. I saw therapists nearly my entire childhood due to Tourette syndrome, and so visiting them in adulthood was simple and something I’ve done often. It helped me come to terms with many quirks about who I am versus how others are, and I found ways to deal with it. What I cannot do is come to terms with how disappointed I am that people will talk about how politically left they are, then just share memes and talk in short sentence fragments about intense subjects when they do talk at all. There’s a one-off person here and there that breaks the mold, and they all go on with their life because they’re great people…which means moving away lol.
Does anyone else have this problem? How do you solve it in person, if at all? I do have plans to leave the area in the next 1-3 years due to a variety of factors not related to this, but I really hate the idea of limiting my in-depth political interactions to online in the meantime.
EDIT: Let me elaborate as well that I have sought feedback from loved ones alongside self-reflection and therapy in the past. Folks who could be intimately involved in the situation or at least aware of who I am on an interpersonal level. The conclusion arrived at tends to be of finger-pointing at others. That’s well and all, but it doesn’t provide me an opportunity to change anything in myself that may be a blocker nor does it help for community building. I view every failure to interact positively as a failure on my own part.
I am not sure your situation, but have you tried talking politics with people in person? I find it is a lot more tranquil and mutual than off line.
Imma also be brutally honest, but it’s only cuz I want you to have the discussion you want to have. People don’t really respond well to rants and long essay type things, at least not without a lil interpersonal understanding. Listening to peoples views ( no matter how reactionary ) can do a lot for them to actually hear yours in return.
Asking questions is also good to see if they’ve even really thought about their opinions, but also shows ur engagement.
I respect the hustle and the passion and def try and publish ur writing of you can!
Yes, I do talk in person. In this particular case, the group is newer and based off combining the offshoots of a few other broken groups in hopes of at least having a mutual networking space. There are works in progress to make more in person events, but they are still being felt out. That being said, socialists are still few and far between here, and those I have established good connections with have moved for new opportunities. The pandemic absolutely killed things for a while too.
I appreciate the honesty, and I do recognize that. I actually seek to listen to other people equally or more than I talk myself in person (unless prodded) for that very purpose, and I tend to have a lot of luck with it with non-socialists. I would rather coexist in a space where everyone felt they could similarly post about their views though, in length, depth, or both. The problem is that they’re not bringing that to the table and I’m at a loss, because I see it easily exists in other spaces online, implying it exists elsewhere in person. I don’t restrict myself past maybe only a lengthy post every few days, but I do this because I am of the opinion it encourages others to feel comfortable doing the same.
Asking questions is a fantastic start and usually how I go about conversations in person, but there are no seeds for this in this current group. Nobody talks.
I appreciate your contribution and feedback as well. I don’t think I’ve written anything worthy of publication, although I’ve toyed with a blog to develop myself a little further. My biggest problem is I feel I am nothing without a community I can develop myself within, and that’s what I was hoping for with these groups.